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Game of Thrones v Avengers: Endgame – which juggernaut wins?

With both reaching their climax in the coming weeks, we pit the two cultural behemoths against each other in a battle for the planet’s eyeballs

PHAN MEM RIC, PHAN MEM BAN HANG, PHAN MEM THUOC

Stuart Heritage

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Who will swipe their way to victory? Avengers v Game of Thrones.
 Who will swipe their way to victory? Avengers v Game of Thrones. Photograph: HBO; Rex Features; Alamy

Culturally speaking, the world will only remember April 2019 for two things: the release of Avengers: Endgame and the final series of Game of Thrones. Both mark the culmination of sprawling stories, both have slightly too many characters to fully keep track of, and both are essentially just really expensive soap operas. They’re huge.

But which is the hugest? Let’s pit Game of Thrones against Avengers: Endgame against each other to see which is most culturally relevant.

Trailer views

We’ll start with something incontestably factual. The official Game of Thrones series eight trailer has been viewed 51 million times on YouTube to date. However, the official Avengers: Endgame trailer has been viewed 83 million times, and it’s only been online for a couple of weeks.

PHAN MEM RIC, PHAN MEM BAN HANG, PHAN MEM THUOC

Characters

Some of the (way too) many characters who have appeared on Game of Thrones.
 Some of the (way too) many characters who have appeared on Game of Thrones. Photograph: HBO

According to Wikipedia, the Marvel Cinematic Universe has introduced us to 226 different characters in the runup to Avengers: Endgame. Meanwhile, Wikipedia states that there have been 271 different characters on Game of Thrones so far. That’s crazy. What the hell are you thinking, Game of Thrones? That’s way too many characters. Game of Thrones wins

Baddies

Both Thanos and the Night King are fully iconic, thanks in part to their iconic gestures. Thanos has his finger snap and the Night King has his slow arm raise. So who wins? Well, Thanos can kill half of everyone in the universe in one go, and the Night King can bring the dead back to life. Ask yourself this – do you wish there were more people in the world, or less? Exactly. Avengers wins

Who’d win in an actual fight?

A walkover ... the Avengers would comfortably beat up the cast of Game of Thrones
 A walkover ... the Avengers would comfortably beat up the cast of Game of Thrones. Photograph: Chuck Zlotnick/AP

Are you kidding? This is a walkover. The Avengers include an unstoppable green monster, a woman who absorbed an explosion and now has unlimited powers, and a literal Norse god. Meanwhile Game of Thrones has Littlefinger, a man who was named after his stupid little fingers. Avengers wins

PHAN MEM RIC, PHAN MEM BAN HANG, PHAN MEM THUOC

Most likely plot fudge

Both Game of Thrones and Avengers: Endgame have been careful to set up otherwordly devices that are likely to rescue their heroes from the clutches of almost certain doom. The Avengers have the Quantum Realm; a subatomic dimension where the limits of time and space fade away to nothing. Meanwhile Game of Thrones has Bran Stark, a boy with prophetic visions and the ability to physically inhabit other people and things. I still feel bad for Bran falling out of the window, so Game of Thrones wins

Best reaction videos

Michelle Fairley as Catelyn Stark at ‘the Red Wedding’.
 There’s a full 35-minute compilation film of people screaming at it ... the Red Wedding. Photograph: Helen Sloan/HBO

When Infinity War was released, someone snuck into a cinema and made an audio recording of the audience’s reaction, which went from triumphant whooping to haunted silence in a fingerclick. It’s fun, but it has nothing on the dozens and dozens of videos posted online when the Red Wedding scene aired. There’s a full 35-minute compilation video of different people screaming and crying at it, which has to tip things in Game of Thrones’ favour.

PHAN MEM RIC, PHAN MEM BAN HANG, PHAN MEM THUOC

Game of Thrones wins

Best Brexit allegory

This one is actually close. Avengers: Endgame is about a brace of brave heroes determined to do whatever it takes to reverse the worst decision that anyone has ever made in all of history, which is very Brexity. Meanwhile, Game of Thrones is about a bunch of short-sighted leaders squabbling among themselves while deliberately ignoring the spectre of an incoming force set to crush them beyond all recognition, which is also very Brexity. The big difference is that in Avengers: Endgame the heroes are likely to succeed, which is an act of pure hopeless fantasy. Game of Thrones wins

PHAN MEM RIC, PHAN MEM BAN HANG, PHAN MEM THUOC

So that’s that. Game of Thrones is better than Avengers. Please don’t come looking for me on Twitter.

 

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